Fertility Options Coach

Infertility is very, very stressful. Writing in a journal can help lower your stress level and help you improve your chances of success with fertility treatments. Journaling is an extremely effective method for lowering anxiety and encouraging healing. Keeping a journal helps you to develop a dialogue with yourself. Writing regularly can help reduce anxiety and depression, and may lead to insights on how to heal your body.

“After I started keeping a journal, I noticed that my symptoms were worse when I was sleep-deprived,” Andrea said. “I guess I just didn’t make the connection until I saw how often I wrote that I was overtired and that my blood sugar levels were much more out of whack than usual.”

James Pennebaker, Ph.D., a research psychologist at the University of Texas at Austin, has conducted numerous studies on the physical benefits of journal writing. His 1997 book Opening Up: The Healing Power of Expressing Emotion, details numerous studies showing that people who write about traumatic experiences feel better emotionally and physically. He found that after writing about difficult emotions study participants had stronger immune function and fewer doctor visits than those who only wrote about their everyday lives.

A groundbreaking 1999 study detailed the effect of writing about stressful events for the chronically ill. Researchers at the State University of New York at Stony Brook asked 112 patients with asthma or rheumatoid arthritis to write 20 minutes a day for three days. Some were told to write about the most stressful event of their lives; others were asked to write about their plans for the day.

After four months, asthma patients who wrote about stressful events showed a 19 percent improvement in lung function, and rheumatoid arthritis sufferers had a 28 percent improvement in overall symptoms. There was no change in those who had only written about daily plans. (Journ. Amer. Med. Assoc., April 1999, 281:14)

Emptying your brain on paper can also help with stress relief and improve sleep problems. Kathleen Adams, founder/director of the Center for Journal Therapy and author of Journal to the Self and The Way of the Journal, refers to this as containment. “Use your journal book literally as a container,” she advises. “…When you write, you are moving thoughts, feelings and energy out of your mind and body and into a neutral, receptive place where they will be stored safely for you.” Even this seemingly simple act can do wonders for your stress and anxiety levels.

Polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS) sounds pretty scary. At least once a week I hear from a young woman who has just been diagnosed with PCOS. Far too often her doctor has said something like this, “You will not be able to get pregnant without help, if at all. You may get cancer, heart disease or diabetes. Lose weight, take metformin, come back when you want to get pregnant.” These women are terrified and often very depressed about their future. Yes, PCOS is a serious diagnosis, but it is not as bad as these doctors make it seem.

Most women with PCOS do have children if they want them. Yes, it is often more difficult to conceive with PCOS, but most women suffering from polycystic ovary syndrome are able to have children even if some of them need medical help to do it.

Polycystic ovary syndrome raises your risk of diabetes, certain cancers and heart disease. What the doctors leave out is that there are ways to significantly reduce your risk. PCOS is a wake-up call to take care of your body. It is a reminder that you can’t take your health for granted. It is no where near the doom and gloom prognosis that many women are given.

Treating PCOS is not easy. I don’t like having to pay attention to my diet and exercise. I would prefer to keep flying by the seat of my pants through life. Slowiing down and taking care of myself are worth it and the same things I have to do to care for my PCOS symptoms are the same things experts are now receommending we all do to take care of ourselves. Eat right, sleep right, exercise, relax….

I have been struggling with PCOS since puberty. More than 20 years later I am still going strong. I do have to be careful to take care of myself a little more than average. I am still working on having a baby. But my life is full and I am able to control the worst PCOS symptoms by taking good care of myself.

Living with PCOS is not always easy. It is far easier than living with many, many other conditions. In many ways I feel lucky to have PCOS instead of some of the illnesses I see other people struggling with.

When you learn you have PCOS it can throw you for a loop. Pick yourself up, learn more about it, learn how to take care of your body.

Most PCOS symptoms can be reduced or eliminated with good self care. Take the time to listen to your body and take care of yourself and you will reap the rewards. PCOS is a wake-up call – not a tragedy.

A small, but important, new study shows that women with PCOS do have babies at almost the same rate as women without PCOS. The difference is that for many women with PCOS, they begin to ovulate regularly a bit later in life as their hormones settle out a bit. For women without PCOS, ovulation slows down as they move into their 30’s. For women with PCOS, as ovulation slows down, it allows for better ovulation and fewer cysts.

The study, published in the journal Human Reproduction, looked at the reproductive history of 91 women diagnosed with PCOS and 87 non-PCOS controls, all study participants were 35 or older. Participants in the study were asked about the number and timing of babies and results from women with PCOS and without PCOS were compared. Among women who had attempted to have children, 86.7% of PCOS patients and 91.6% of controls had given birth to at least one child. Among women with PCOS who had given birth, 73.6% had gotten pregnant on their own, without medical intervention.

As I have noted in other articles, women who have babies without help are rarely diagnosed with PCOS, even if they have all of the other symptoms. PCOS makes it harder to have a baby, but it does not rule it out.

While this study is pretty small, it fits with the answers I have gotten in surveys and anecdotal evidence from the many women who have shared their stories with me. Most women w

For many years now I have suspected a trend towards women with PCOS getting pregnant on their own a bit later in life. Over and over, women tell me that they tried for years, then were able to have babies without help.

You can read about the study in New Scientist magazine and I have also included a link directly to the study.

New Scientist Article

Link to Study

Now, we know that for women who ovulate normally, fertility decreases over time. Apparently, for women with PCOS there is an increase in fertility before it decreases again.

My advice (after waiting until my late 30’s for that first baby to finally maker her appearance)? If you are ready to have a baby, try for one. If it doesn’t happen right away and you are in your early to mid 20’s, find something wonderful to do with your time while you wait. You’ll cherish the things you accomplished during that time long after the babies do finally make their appearance.

There are a lot of good things about having an IUI or intruterine insemination. You know the sperm is getting where it needs to be. You know the timing is right. You are avoiding all the issues with a difficult cervix or having the wrong vaginal PH. On the other hand, you just don’t expect to be trying to conceive a child with your feet in stirrups and two other women in the room.

I will never forget my first IUI. My doctor assured me that it would be much, much easier than the HSG (hysterosalpongogram) they had used to check for blockages in my tubes. I told him the HSG tech said my cervix was difficult. He said they’d use ultrasound to guide the way and that it would not hurt as much. Mostly he lied.

For one thing, my doctor didn’t perform the procedure. It was performed by two super nice nurses. They asked me to identify the donor sample we were to use. I said I’d never seen it before, but hey, looks like sperm to me. They asked me to check the numbers on the syringe and the numbers on the form I had to sign. Yup, looks like sperm to me.

They didn’t use ultrasound either. Don’t know if that would have helped, but for me the worst of it seems to happen when they are trying to find the opening to my cervix. Seems mine is never in the right spot. It took a long time for them to get the right size speculum in the right spot to see where they were going. I don’t want to scare anyone, because from what I hear mine was far, far worse than average (as usual). But this was not fun.

Once they figured out where to go, the insemination itself was a breeze. Then the cramping started. I had to stay on my back for 20 minutes while “gravity” did its thing. They tilted the edge of the table up in the air and left the room. I shifted, squirmed, cried, and tapped my feet for 20 minutes while I begged these anonymous sperm to swim the right direction despite my cramping uterus. My husband said, “Don’t worry, labor will be a lot worse.” He is a very, very lucky man. If I had not been afraid of losing $300 worth of donor sperm I might have broken my vow of non-violence.

Since that first time, I have had three more IUI. None of them have worked for me, but at least the next three were much more comfortable. I had a different doctor and she actually did the procedure instead of passing it off to nurses.

Studies have shown that IUI in conjunction with other treatements can improve your odds of conceiving.

The mere thought of a sperm test is enough to send many men squirming right out the door. Yet male infertility accounts is about as common as female infertility – and the test is much less invasive than many female infertility tests. Why are so many men reluctant to be tested? For some, it is fear of looking like less of a man. For others, it is just a general discomfort with medical things.

If you have been trying to get pregnant for more than a year if you are under 30, or more than 6 months if you are over 30, it is time for both of you to be talking to your doctor. Even if you already know that you have a fertility issue, it is important to have your partner tested as well.

Many women have told me that they have undergone painful and expensive infertility treatments, only to find that their male partner also had fertility problems. A simple sperm analysis is only about $90-125 even without insurance, and it can save a whole lot of heartache and expense.

My husband and I were shocked to find out that he had morphology issues (sperm shape and function). We had assumed that since he had one child from a previous marriage, and we had gotten pregnant with our first child easily, that any fertility problems must be mine.

If you can get your partner to open up about why he is refusing to be tested, it can help clear things up. If not, you can still work towards getting him tested by gently explaining that the test for him is non-invasive and that it will bring you a lot of peace of mind to know the results. You can also explain that in many cases, any problems can be treated easily.

Let him know that by being tested, he can make it easier on you and save money on treatments by narrowing down the cause. Assure him that your feelings for him will not change, no matter what the test results. Men play tough, but they often really fear losing a woman’s love if they are not perfect.

Finally, find some simple but good information online that can help him to understand how important this test is in helping you achieve your goal of a healthy baby.